What Lies Within Read online

  “Then why don’t you walk away from it?”

  Kyla came out of her chair. “Walk away? From Justice Construction?”

  Mason covered the ground between them in two long strides, taking her hands in his, pressing them to his chest. “Kyla, you know how I feel about you. I’ve made it clear I want this relationship to be a permanent one.”

  “I know, but—”

  “If we were married, you wouldn’t need to work any longer. You’re meant for better things than letting the stress of running a construction company weigh you down.”

  “I’m not weighed down.” She stood and went to look out the french doors leading to the balcony. “I’ve worked hard to get JuCo to the place it is now.”

  “Darling, I know that. And you’re amazing at what you do.” His gentle tone firmed. “But what point is there in doing it if it doesn’t bring you a sense of joy or accomplishment?”

  She bit her lip. What point, indeed?

  The touch of his hand on her shoulder told her he’d come to stand behind her. “Sweetheart, you know the last few years have been good for Rawlins Building. More than good.”

  Kyla nodded. Mason’s company had won a number of lucrative contracts from Ballat Enterprises, one of the top investment developers in the Northwest. She’d been so proud of Mason when those contracts came through.

  “Why don’t you let me buy you out?”

  She turned, eyes wide. “Buy me out?”

  He took her by the shoulders, his grip gentle. “Think about it. We could merge the two companies. Even combine the names, so your father’s business continues to exist. And you could rest easy, knowing all you’ve done, the business you’ve built with such devotion, would be taken care of, that the employees would be treated fairly, and that the fine reputation you and your father built would go on. If you wanted, you could still be involved a little. But really. Wouldn’t it be nice to be able to travel at will? To spend your days relaxing and even having a little fun? Isn’t it time you enjoyed some of the nicer things in life?”

  He lifted her fingers to his lips and, much to her surprise, kissed the tips. “Please, darling, let me set you free.”

  His lips on her fingers, his gaze caressing her face, Kyla waited for the surge of relief, for the overwhelming sense that this was the right thing to do.

  And waited.

  Nothing.

  Well, that wasn’t quite true. She did feel something—a shiver skittering across the top of her skin, like a smooth stone skipping over water, touching down just often and long enough to send ripples through her. But they weren’t ripples of delight. Far from it.

  They were ripples of unease.

  The silence between them stretched—along with Kyla’s nerves. Finally Mason let out a low sigh and released her hands. “All right, Kyla. I won’t press you.” His gaze caught hers, held it. And she saw something deep in those eyes.

  Something that sent the stone skimming again.

  “But someday soon, darling, you’re going to need to make up your mind. About your business.” He eased back into his chair, his gaze still locked with hers. “About me.”

  Remorse swept her then. “Oh, Mason …” She moved toward him, and he held his hand out without hesitation. That simple act—acceptance in the face of her doubts … and in the face of what she’d put him through that night—moved her deeply. She took his hand and perched on the arm of his chair.

  “I’ve already made up my mind about you.” She traced the long fingers laced with hers, and he chuckled.

  “Have you, now?”

  “I trust you, Mason. And I know you only want what’s best for me.”

  “And?”

  She bit her lip.

  His smile tightened a fraction. “And you love me?”

  Kyla straightened. “Oh, of course. Yes, of course I do.”

  “Then say it.”

  Kyla pulled back, but his arm encircled her, keeping her perched on the arm of his chair.

  “Kyla, just say it. You love me.”

  She tried to do as he asked. It was such a small thing, after all, to say those words to him. But when she opened her mouth, all that came out was, “I do.”

  “You do what?”

  “I …” What was wrong with her? Why couldn’t she just say those words to him?

  “Good grief! What is that?”

  Kyla spun at Mason’s exclamation, just in time to spot a flash of tricolored fur skittering across the kitchen floor, then scooting inside the open lower cabinet.

  Oh no! She glanced down the hallway to her bedroom. Surely she’d shut the door, hadn’t she?

  “A rat!” Mason’s eyes were wide. “You’ve got a rat!”

  For a moment she considered letting him think that, until he strode into the kitchen and pulled a broom from the closet.

  “Mason!” She put herself between him and the kitten, which must surely be cowering in the corner of the cupboard. “No!” She took hold of the broom and wrested it from him. “It’s not a rat.”

  “It’s not?”

  It took a few moments to return the broom to its proper hiding place, and she used that time to think through what she was going to say.

  Why? What’s the big deal? So you got a cat? So what? This is your house, after all. The man doesn’t live here.

  Kyla shook the troublesome thoughts from her head and knelt on the floor.

  “Be careful! It might bite you.”

  She angled a look over her shoulder, then went back to the task at hand. Sure enough, the kitten was pressed as far back in the corner as it could get. Kyla reached toward it, crooning. “Come on, Serendipity. It’s okay …”

  “Seren—! Kyla, what are you doing?”

  She spun around at his impatient bark and stood to face him, hands on her hips. “I’m trying to calm down a defenseless kitten that you terrorized. Now hush, Mason.”

  To say he was astonished was far more than an understatement. The poor man’s face was mottled with color, and his mouth hung open.

  He looked like something was trying to throttle him.

  Probably his indignation, but Kyla couldn’t worry about mollifying him right now. She knelt again and, after a number of minutes, finally coaxed the kitten from the cupboard. She lifted it into her arms, noting how natural it felt to cuddle the little creature, and stood again to face the still-steaming Mason.

  Kyla cleared her throat. “Mason, I’d like you to meet a fr—”

  “It’s a kitten.” He looked like he’d just downed an unripe persimmon.

  She couldn’t restrain her wry tone. “Yes, she’s a kitten.”

  “But … what is it doing here?”

  She turned sideways, as though to shelter the animal from his acerbic tone. “More to the point, she’s my kitten. Her name is Serendipity.”

  “Your—”

  She waited, but nothing else was forthcoming. He just stood there, staring at her as though convinced she’d taken leave of her senses.

  So much for hoping he’d warm up to the idea.

  She went into the living room, Mason following close behind. They sat, and Kyla told the tale again, just as she’d told it to Rafael. Mason listened, but the tightness around his mouth never lessened. When she finished, he sat there, hands on his knees, eyes fixed on the kitten in her lap.

  “You’re keeping it.” Half statement, half disbelieving question.

  Her reply was one hundred percent absolute. “I’m keeping her.”

  His gaze lifted to hers, and she saw a hard edge there. “I see. So the fact that I don’t care for cats …?”

  Kyla bit her lip. Why couldn’t he understand what this meant to her? “Mason, I’m sorry. But I really think if you’d just let yourself relax and spend some time with her, you’d find she’s really quite delightful.”

  “And you know this after, what, a few hours?”

  No. She’d known it within seconds. But she wasn’t about to say that out loud. She stood. “Let me get
her settled in the bedroom, and make sure the door is closed this time, and we can discuss it more, if you like.”

  By the time she’d dealt with the kitten and returned to the living room, Mason had his coat on. Alarm coursed through her.

  “Mason, please—”

  He took her outstretched hand. “Never mind, Kyla.” He tugged her close and slipped his arms around her. “It’s just a kitten. We’ll work it out. Somehow. I mean”—he almost smiled—“everyone can use a little Serendipity in their lives.”

  Hope sparked as he hugged her, trailed a finger down her cheek, and pressed a soft kiss to her lips. “I’ll call you tomorrow.”

  She followed him to the front door, then watched him walk to his car and drive away. As she closed the door and walked back into the living room, one question taunted her.

  What is wrong with me?

  Mason was a good man. A man of faith and integrity.

  Faith?

  She pursed her lips at the hint of doubt. Yes, faith. All right, so Mason wasn’t as vocal about his relationship with God as others—say Avidan or Jediah Curry, her sister’s fiancé. And yes, there were times Kyla wondered whether Mason’s profession of belief wasn’t more because he knew it was so important to her …

  She shook off the troublesome thoughts. Mason’s faith was real. And it was private. There was nothing wrong with that.

  Or with the man. Who, by the way, loved her. Wanted to marry her. Any woman would be thrilled to have a man like Mason offer to take care of her.

  Any woman, it seemed, but her. Because no matter how much sense it made, no matter how hard she tried to sell herself on the idea that it was time to accept Mason’s proposal …

  Her heart just wasn’t buying it.

  TEN

  “The heart has eyes which the brain knows nothing of.”

  CHARLES H. PERKHURST

  “God knows all hearts, and he sees you. He keeps watch over your soul.”

  PROVERBS 24:12

  I don’t buy it.”

  Kyla plopped back against the pillows on her bed. “Don’t buy what, Annot?”

  “You say you’re okay, but you don’t sound okay. Are you sure you’re—”

  “I’m fine.“ Oh dear. Best tone it down or her sister would be on the next plane to Portland. “Really. I’m just tired, that’s all.”

  “I didn’t wake you, did I? I mean, you’re usually up and running by now.”

  A glance at the clock confirmed Annot’s words. Nine o’clock! Kyla couldn’t remember the last time she’d slept in this late. What was more amazing was that it actually felt good. “I was just about to get up.”

  “Me-oww!”

  The sound was followed by a ball of fur landing on Kyla’s head. Kyla yelped and caught the kitten.

  Wonderful. The beast was a morning person.

  “Kyla! Are you all right?”

  “I’m. Fine.” Kyla forced the words through gritted teeth, then forced herself to relax. “My cat just jumped on my head.”

  “Your … what?”

  Ha. Take that, Miss You’re-Not-Spontaneous. “My cat. Or kitten, to be precise. I just got her yesterday.”

  Annot’s squeal rivaled any sound Serendipity had made. “You got a pet! That’s so great.”

  “Hmm. I wish Mason thought so.” She cuddled Serendipity close, loving the way the kitten’s purrs rumbled against her chest. “Anyway, I was just relaxing this morning. I did just finish a big job yesterday.”

  “Oh, no, no, no. You don’t get off that easy. What’s the kitten’s name? Where’d you get her? What’s she look like? I want details. And pictures.”

  “Okay, okay. Soon. But right now I have to get up and get busy.”

  “New project already?”

  “I’m working on it.” And so she was. But this time she was going to do something different. Something she should have done long ago.

  The ensuing silence told Kyla her little sister had something on her mind. “What is it, Annot?”

  “What is what?”

  “Whatever you’re deciding whether or not to say.”

  Her sister’s heavy sigh was ample confirmation. “I’m not going to ask it.”

  “Ask what?”

  “If you’re okay.”

  Kyla would have screamed if she’d been given to such displays.

  “I’m sorry, Kylie. I’m just worried about you, that’s all.”

  Annot’s gentle words eased the tension in her shoulders. Her sister knew her so well. And loved her anyway. She rolled on her side, reaching with one hand to pull the comforter around her as she moved. “I’m just so”—she shrugged into the blanket—“I don’t know. Restless, I guess.”

  “Kylie, really. What’s going on?”

  I’ve realized I lost my way and didn’t even know it. “Nothing.” No need to worry her sister. This was her problem to sort through, and so she would. Now that she’d realized what was gnawing at her, why she felt so empty, she knew what to do to make it right.

  That’s what she was best at. Making things right. “I think I’m coming down with a cold or something. You know how I hate summer colds.”

  Annot’s chuckle warmed her even more than the comforter. “Summer is over, goof.”

  “Not yet. Autumn doesn’t officially begin for another two and a half weeks. I refuse to surrender summer one day sooner than I have to. Annot, about the wedding? What would you think about making it a double wedding?”

  “What?”

  She couldn’t blame her sister for her shocked reaction. The question had shocked Kyla as well. What was she thinking? “I don’t know. I mean, Mason asked me to marry him again—”

  “Again?”

  Kyla kneaded her temples. “Annot, would you please stop shrieking? You’re killing my head.”

  “Kyla Marie Justice, are you telling me a man proposed to you and you didn’t tell me when it happened?”

  “Actually, a man proposed to me three times now—”

  “Kylie!!”

  Her temples pounded. “Shrieking. Again.”

  “Sorry. Again.” Annot softened her tone. “Okay, I’m speaking in calm tones now. Kyla, beloved sister, this man who proposed to you three times. Is it Mason?”

  Kyla vented her exasperation to the ceiling. “Well, who else do you think it would be? The hunky barista down at the coffee shop?”

  She could have bitten off her tongue. She was getting as careless as Annot about letting words just blurp out of her mouth. With any luck, her sister would pay no attention—

  “What hunky barista?”

  Of course. Why should she think she’d have any more luck today than usual? “Never mind.”

  “Kylie—”

  “Would you please forget about the barista?”

  “Hunky barista, you said.”

  “Hunky schmunky! I’m talking about Mason.”

  “Schmunky?”

  “He asked me to marry him again last night—”

  “Did you really just say schmunky?”

  “What I just said was that Mason has asked me to marry him.”

  A pause. Apparently Annot needed to absorb this news. Then, “So … what did you say?”

  Kyla rolled onto her side. Why had she opened her mouth about this? She should have known her dear sister would ask question after question. None of which she was prepared to answer. “Nothing.”

  “Nothing.”

  Kyla sighed. “Right. Nothing.”

  “See! I told you he wasn’t the one for you—”

  “I didn’t say that.”

  “You don’t have to! I mean, if you loved him, the answer would have been immediate.”

  Oh, now that was going too far. Kyla sat up, sending poor Serendipity tumbling across the bed, and clutched the receiver. “Now listen. Just because I want time to think about the most important decision I’ll ever make doesn’t mean I don’t love Mason. Of course I love him. Why shouldn’t I? He’s intelligent, cultured, an excel
lent businessman—”

  “Kylie, will you listen to yourself? You sound like you’re discussing a potential employee, not your soul mate.”

  Kyla’s brows rose. “I never said Mason was my soul mate.”

  “Exactly! But don’t you want that? Someone who’s part of your heart in a way no one else ever could be?”

  “Please, forget I said anything.”

  “Right! Forget my sister said someone proposed to her.”

  “Annot, please. I shouldn’t have said what I did. I’m not even sure Mason will like the whole double wedding idea. He’s rather—”

  “Persnickety.”

  “—particular.” She flopped onto her back, making her tone as scolding as she could without hurting her sister’s feelings. “He’s already mentioned a couple of times that he wants us to be married someplace exotic.”

  “Is that what you want?”

  “I don’t know.”

  Another sigh. “Okay, I’ll let it go for now. And I promise I won’t bug you about marrying or not marrying Mr. Thrillsville.”

  Kyla threw an arm over her aching eyes. “You’re not bugging me, Annot. Not really. It’s just that I’m not ready to make a decision on all this yet.”

  “Listen, Kylie, try to get some rest, okay? You don’t sound good.”

  “Gee, thanks.”

  “You know what I mean.”

  Yes, she did. And as she hung up the phone, she knew she couldn’t ignore it any longer. All these years, she’d managed to keep the past at bay. So why, all of a sudden, was it there, haunting her?

  Condemning her.

  Something was going on. What, she didn’t know. But something was there on the fringes.

  And it was headed for her.

  Well, fine. Whatever was coming, there was only one way to prepare for it. Kyla leaned forward to lift her Bible from the side table.

  Arroow-rooww!

  Annie Justice swatted at her German shepherd, who was walking in circles, that heavy tail pummeling her for added emphasis. “Look out, you crazy moose-dog! You’re gonna knock me over.”

  Kodi’s cold nose came to nudge at her, and she stood. “Okay, okay. I surrender. Let’s go for a run.”